Control

Innocent heedlessness is unskillfulness; it is heedlessness that is born from unknowing.

When control of another is not an option, how can we proceed skillfully, without causing suffering either to ourselves or others?
When the ground is overturned, how much more fertile is the soil?
When we cannot skillfully interfere in the actions or words of another, what can we do?
When is it alright to let go of our desires, but not go past our limits, to allow for the healing of another?
When we safely (safety for ourselves and other), step out of the way and allow for creative chaos to happen, it is alright when we can attend to ourselves, by watching that we remain heedful in the observation of our own fermentations (thoughts, that lead to suffering, that deludedly justify entitlement):

Excerpt from the:
Sabbasava Sutta: All the Fermentations

...The Blessed One said, "Monks, the ending of the fermentations is for one who knows; sees, I tell you, not for one who does not know does not see. For one who knows what sees what? Appropriate attention inappropriate attention. When a monk attends inappropriately, unarisen fermentations arise, and arisen fermentations increase. When a monk attends appropriately, unarisen fermentations do not arise, and arisen fermentations are abandoned. There are fermentations to be abandoned by seeing, those to be abandoned by restraining, those to be abandoned by using, those to be abandoned by tolerating, those to be abandoned by avoiding, those to be abandoned by dispelling, and those to be abandoned by developing."

When a monk attends appropriately, unarisen fermentations do not arise, and arisen fermentations are abandoned. There are fermentations to be abandoned by:

• Seeing: Discerning ideas that are fit or unfit for attention and discerning the delusion of I/me/ my ownership.

• Restraining: Restraint of the sense faculties, body and intellect faculties.

• Using: Non-exploitation or manipulation of resources, no overindulgence or self-torture.

• Tolerating: Difficulty is endured with patience.

• Avoiding: Staying away from things that will kill us, such as suicide.

• Dispelling: Does not tolerate an arisen thought of sensuality (of the five senses) and unskillful mental qualities, these thoughts are abandoned, dispelled, and wiped out of existence.

• Developing: Reflecting appropriately, develops mindfulness as a factor for Awakening dependent on seclusion... dispassion... cessation, resulting in letting go. He develops analysis of qualities as a factor for Awakening... persistence as a factor for Awakening... rapture as a factor for Awakening... serenity as a factor for Awakening... concentration as a factor for Awakening... equanimity as a factor for Awakening dependent on seclusion... dispassion... cessation, resulting in letting go...

              http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.002.than.html

When all is beyond our skillful means what remains is to watch that we remain in good order, and that we not enter into suffering because we believe we must control someone/something else...

Dharma Talks

What are Dharma talks?
Dharma talk is the free public speaking of the teachings of the Buddha for training.
What are the guidelines for giving a Dharma talk?

First, there is the understanding of what is Right Speech, as one of the Noble Eight of the Noble Eight Fold Path.
The Abhaya Sutta
The Subhasita Sutta
A diagram of the conditions, for Right Speech, as stated in the Abhaya Sutta:

Second, the subject taken for the speech can be anything from the Dharma, which is any Sutra/Sutta.
There are thousands of Sutras and hundreds of Suttas:
BuddhaSutra.com 
Dharma Net International 

Third, based on the Sutra/Sutta chosen, there is an expounding of how this Dharma is lived, told as a personal story or any analogy that can sufficiently relate the meaning of how this Sutra/Sutta is lived.

You may think that this is a training for just the speaker....
It is also a training for the listener.

As you listen you may notice that you have never heard this before and the teaching is uplifting and encouraging, or maybe it is something that you have heard before and it is dull, boring, and possibly even critical.

If you are drawn in by the 'ear' sense and hooked by this sensuality(of the senses) into believing that these words are the source of either your well being or your suffering, you are incorrect.
Better to notice this 'ear' sense object(in the mind as a thought) arising and let it go, so that there are no associated 'fermentations' as a result that invariably lead to binding and more suffering....

What is a fermentation?
It is a thought that justifies a sense object. A thought that justifies dissatisfaction or satisfaction.
What is a sense object?
A thought that arises as a result of sensory impute, eye, ear, nose, taste and touch.

• Example of a happy fermentation which leads to suffering: "This Dharma talk is great, I am so glad!" this thought leads to dissatisfaction later when the Dharma talk is disappointing, which then may even lead to avoidance/aversion which is one of the three unwholesome roots....

• Example of a unhappy fermentation which leads to suffering: "This Dharma talk is terrible, I am so disappointed!" this thought justifies dissatisfaction, which then may even lead to avoidance/aversion which is one of the three unwholesome roots....

So there is much opportunity not only for the speaker but also for the listener.

Remember that even if there is no one to hear your words, that you are listening, and you are your greatest teacher, so do not be disappointed!

Ignorance

What is ignorance?
Ignorance is when you recognize that something is right but you do not do it.
It is unknowing also.
It is because you do not know  and still do not have complete understanding of what is right
that there is the presence, in the mind, of the option not to do what is right.
(Supposing there must also be the ability to distinguish right from wrong first.)
When ignorance is completely dispelled we no longer experience an option.

• For example, it is ignorant to say that one can rightly not stop at a red light at a traffic intersection; to feel the choice is to perceive an option. When you know  that it is right to stop then ignorance has been dispelled. (The perception of an option  having ceased also).

• For example, it is ignorant to say that one can rightly not brush their teeth; to feel the choice is to perceive an option. When you know  that it is right to brush your teeth then ignorance has been dispelled. (The perception of an option  having ceased also).

• For example, it is ignorant to say that one can rightly not use sunscreen before they go out into the sunshine; to feel the choice is to perceive an option. When you know  that it is right to use sunscreen then ignorance has been dispelled. (The perception of an option  having ceased also and of course using sunscreen that is free of oxybenzone is a part of the knowing  also).

What is it to know?
To know is to not be divided by even a shadow of duality.
Is this then the end of right and wrong?
The need to suggest that something is right or wrong is to say that there is an uncertainty,
because where the one exists there the other exists also.

Middle Path

What is Buddhist practice?
It is the skillful use of The Noble Eight Fold Path and The Four Noble Truths to have well-being in this life.
What is Right and what is Wrong?
It is, what is well-being.
Well being is peace and blissfully abiding in this moment without being hooked by ignorance, attachment, and aversion (avoidance/asceticism/hatred):

"In the Buddhist teachings, the three poisons (of ignorance, attachment, and aversion) are the primary causes that keep sentient beings trapped in samsara. These three poisons are said to be the root of all of the other kleshas.^[5][6]"

^{https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three_poisons}

 

"The three poisons (Sanskrit: triviṣa; Tibetan: dug gsum) or the three unwholesome roots (Sanskrit: akuśala-mūla; Pāli: akusala-mūla), in Buddhism, refer to the three root kleshas of Moha (delusion, confusion), Raga (greed, sensual attachment), and Dvesha (aversion, ill will).^[1][2] These three poisons are considered to be three afflictions or character flaws innate in a being, the root of Taṇhā (craving), and thus in part the cause of Dukkha (suffering, pain, unsatisfactoriness) and rebirths.^[1][3]"

^{https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three_poisons}

 

When your goal is well-being and you want to live alone to have well-being, then it is about understanding you. When your goal is well-being and you live with others, well-being is about skillfully understanding what is well-being for you, and the others that are a part of your life.

So what is Middle Path?
It is about knowing where you end, and finding your limit.
Is it about sacrificing your limit?
Your limit changes based on your skill; through skillful understanding only you can decide when it is more than you can give, someone else cannot know this for you.
When an effort is an unhealthy sacrifice it results in suffering and it is wrong effort.
When an effort is giving from abundance and wisdom, it can be right effort.

Do you know that you are giving to your foot when you put on a sock or not?
Sometimes you feel like wearing socks and sometimes you don't.

Does feeling have anything to do with what is right?
What is right should not be determined by feeling because feeling is one of  The Five Aggregates of Clinging. (Topic of future post.)

You can  imagine that well-being via middle path is balance, and that in order to maintain that balance well-being cannot be an unhealthy sacrifice; that if it is an unhealthy sacrifice than it is not balance.
So it is about the skillful use of wisdom that is derived from understanding yourself within The Noble Eight Fold Path and The Four Noble Truths.

For advanced practice then there is understanding emptiness, in that if there is form there is suffering.
This is the ultimate goal; to see emptiness in form without aversion to form.